Farcebook

YOU are the product and you cost him zero! Facebook is killing the arts and has stunted dissent.
Facebook is ruining focus and craftsmanship. FB has also caused an immense problem of loneliness as it professes connection? “Curating the exhibition of the self has become a 24/7 occupation” meanwhile : Life happens. Real life.
“Facebook imprisons us in the business of self-presenting.” I could have learnt a language if I applied the time I have spent making advertising fodder for Mark Z. ( or writing this rant maybe! )
Everyone is forced to have the same page format on FB? I guess don’t like the taste of ‘Soma’ today.

with love

 

 

Just The Facts
Facebook is like a bathroom wall that everyone writes on except real bathroom walls are more interesting.
Facebook gives needy people a place to go(without actually getting off their presumably fat asses) where everyone knows their name. Like “Cheers” sans booze and good writing.
Facebook is like masturbating: nobody’s stimulated except you.

Masters of Baiting or “Master-Baiters”: These are the folks who post things like “At the ER. Probably getting stitches” or “(Username) just did something he regrets” without any further details or information. These kinds of posts are inevitably followed by dozens of comments like “OMG what happened?” “I hope you’re okay” “I’m praying for you” and it just goes on and on. Back in the old days of voicemail, a true friend would never leave a message saying “At the ER…” or “I just did something…” and leave it at that. These kinds of messages would have solicited annoyance and accusations of immaturity and histrionic tendencies. In other words: “Hey, it’s me. Don’t fucking leave me vague messages and get me all worried you little drama queen!”
Horror Scorers: These are users who post things like “My grandma died 13 years ago today” or “My sister has cancer”. The comments roll in: “I’m so sorry” , “My prayers are with you”, “I didn’t know you had a sister because I barely know you but I’m thinking of you today.” The poster isn’t dead. The poster doesn’t have cancer YET the poster gets worldwide sympathy. Blow. Me.
Combo Platters: Instead of posting “My sister has cancer” these users take it one more step by baiting for comments saying “I’m thinking about my family and I’m sad”. This could be the worst sort of user: I’ll score sympathy from someone else’s pain and I’ll bait you into wondering what the hell is going on. This wouldn’t be shocking if I were writing about teenage users but these are middle-aged professionals. This unapologetically self-centered behavior probably leads fundamentalists of all religions to point to Facebook and say “This proves it: the world is coming to an end in 2012.”

Comments are closed.